by vivrant thang on all about me

So take me as I am,
or have nothing at all.
Just take me as I am,
or have nothing at all.

Don’s poignant post over at Minus The Bars and a conversation with several bloggers over the past couple of weeks has me thinking hard about the direction I want to take Songs in the Key of Life.

I only started this blog a few months ago, but it’s been cooking on the back burner of my mind since the beginning of the year. I’m an avid blog reader, though a not-so-avid writer, but I have always felt that I had a place in the blogosphere. I think one of the major things that was holding me back was wondering what persona I wanted to put out there. How much did I want to share? What would people think of me if I shared some of the not-so-good parts of myself?

• The fact that I used to weigh more than Shaq

• The fact that I can be undisciplined, lazy, messy, occasionally mean-spirited, and foul-mouthed

• The fact that at 30, I am still ambivalent about marriage

• The fact that I’m just not down for the celibacy blues and at any given time, I may have a cut-buddy or two

• The fact that I think our energy and attention would be better placed with the Megan Williams and the Dunbar Village cases (for example) than in sympathizing with two dumb asses, TI and Micheal Vick

• The fact that I, Head Negress in Charge of the Bilal Stan Association, am an official Bilal stalker 🙂

Well, that last one isn’t all that bad, right?

If I put all this and more on my blog for anyone that wanders in here to read, it leaves me open to all kinds of criticism. Before I started the blog, I wondered how I would deal with that that. I’m not always the most patient or tolerant person. Say or do the wrong thing and it can get ugly….sort of like if say, NBA baller Greg Oden and Craig Mack were to procreate.

I think you get the picture.

However, like any writer, I come to realize when I’m putting my thoughts out there for anyone to read, I have to expect people to disagree, though it should be done respectfully. In some of my posts, I’ve actually encouraged people to comment, particularly if they disagreed with me. I like engaging with those who have an informed opposing viewpoint, again when it’s respectfully presented. It opens up my mind a bit.

I still battle with how much I’ll share on this blog about myself and about others close to me. I’ve already called out some of my friends for one thing or another. Nothing I haven’t said to their faces. I’m just starting to share this space with more of them which tells me that I’m settling in and getting more comfortable.

As I’ve said many times, I don’t know where this blog is going but I do know that everything you read here will be me, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Feel free to disagree (say it with me, re-spect-fully) or even call me a crazy fool (I might agree). But you’ll have to take me as I am. Or have nothing at all.