Mother, mother
There’s too many of you crying
Brother, brother, brother
There’s far too many of you dying
You know we’ve got to find a way
To bring some lovin’ here today
Can we talk for a minute,
Girl I want to know your name
I started,
To write you letters,
But I wanted,
To be more clever,
I wanted to get down and sweet talk to you
Seems I’m getting a lot of my inspiration from the Steve Harvey Morning Show lately. They did a bit about how men these days don’t know how to talk to women. They don’t have any game, no real conversation. So texting is right up their alley. With texting, they don’t have to really express full thoughts. Or they can say things they don’t have the balls (my word, not theirs) to say face-to-face.
This was humourous to me because it’s something I’ve complained to my girlfriends about before. I’ve had dudes try to get to know me via text – asking me to relay my whole life story. I’ve also had instances where guys tried to have relationship-altering discussions via text. Not! I always shut that down immediately. I’m just not going to get into anything heavy via text. I know it may be a generational thing. Maybe that’s just the way it’s done these days. Call me old-school. You got to call and talk to me about anything serious.
For instance, I had been seeing this guy off and on for over a year. It ended because of something he did and I kept it moving and didn’t look back. One day out the blue, he texts me and says I’ve been on his mind and he just wanted to get that off his chest. That’s getting it off your chest? I couldn’t have been more underwhelmed.
Then there was another dude I was seeing for a while that I had to fire because he was being very inconsistent (the number one way to get shown the door when dealing with me). Again, I kept it moving and didn’t look back. One day out the blue, he texts me to say he got a new cell phone and could he give me a call that evening? How about “no”? Dude, just be a man about it! Pick up the phone and plead your case! Am I asking for too much here? How can I really take you seriously?
I’m just not for serious discussions taking place via text message. You can’t detect tone. You can’t see facial expressions. Actually, I prefer to do these things face to face so I can look into a man’s eyes and observe body language. Author and Washington Post columnist Natalie Moore agrees. Texting is for random asides; quick questions ; naughty thoughts (and even those I prefer to hear). To me, any man that is serious about you is not going to try to carry on the relationship that way. He wants to hear your voice. Nothing made me smile more during the day when the ex would call me randomly to see how my day was going. That’s how you do it.
Can you hear me now?
Good.
Ladies, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Does it make any difference to you whether a dude texts or calls you? Is this just a sign of the times?
Fellas, please chime in too. Am I expecting too much?
Mother, mother
There’s too many of you crying
Brother, brother, brother
There’s far too many of you dying
You know we’ve got to find a way
To bring some lovin’ here today
Sistahgirl: Black Women & HIV/AIDS is a documentary project in development that delves into the lives of black women living with HIV against the backdrop of the global pandemic that is ravaging our community.
SistahGirl: Black Women and HIV/AIDS is a documentary project featuring the lives of HIV positive Black women from the US, with some traveling on an unprecedented journey to meet HIV positive African women activists to exchange ideas about prevention, treatment, physical, and spiritual healing. The lives of Rae Lewis Thornton, Kamaria Gammon, Michelle Lopez, Raven Lopez, Joyce McDonald, and Shadonna Mon’ques Upshaw will be featured in SistahGirl, which intends to commence filming in the late summer/early fall. SistahGirl will also examine the complexities and challenges in prevention efforts in Black women and provide a platform for discussion about some broader issues surrounding Black women and sexuality. We are currently in pre-production and raising funds to begin filming by late summer early fall. Once completed in 2008, SistahGirl will be used for educational outreach programs for schools, churches, prisons, women’s organizations, poor and disadvantaged urban and rural communities.
In addition to the film, there will be a companion CD and a book.
Mother, mother
There’s too many of you crying
Brother, brother, brother
There’s far too many of you dying
You know we’ve got to find a way
To bring some lovin’ here today
In light of World AIDS Day today, Yobachi Boswell over at The Black Perspective has issued a call to black bloggers to use their individual platforms to call attention to the AIDS crisis, particularly the ravaging effects on the Black community. I was so glad to have found his blog in time to get involved in this important effort.
When I was 17, I watched my uncle die of AIDS. I sat in that hospital room and held his hand as he painfully slipped away from us. It’s an image my mind will never erase. Although we were there almost everyday at the end, he died alone. My mother has still not forgiven herself for not being there.
Over the next several years, my great aunt lost all three of her sons to the disease. My uncle and my great aunt’ s sons were first cousins and they all were longtime intravenous drug users. We believe they passed the disease like they passed that needle.
AIDS remains the leading cause of death for Blacks ages 25 to 44, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Blacks make up just 13% of the population of the USA, but they account for 50% of all new cases of HIV.
Black women account for 70% of all women with HIV.
Here in Washington, DC, the news gets worse.
One in 20 D.C. residents is believed to be HIV-positive, and one in 50 residents has full-blown AIDS.
Although blacks account for 57% of the city’s population, they account for 81% of new HIV cases
37 percent of the new cases were a result of heterosexual transmission, compared to 25 percent that resulted from men having sex with men.
These statistics are extremely sobering. Black women, in particular, are dying from this disease. We have got to take responsibility for our own well-being. Several of my friends have never had an HIV test *, even though they haven’t always practiced safe sex. I think that’s ridiculous in this day and age not to know your status. According to BlackAmericaWeb, “more than one million Americans are estimated to be living with HIV, and one-fourth of those individuals are believed to be unaware of their infection, underscoring the need for expanded HIV testing.”
So on this 2007 World AIDS day, I implore everyone who may read this to:
I know my status, but through research for this post and the ones I’ll post throughout the week, I’ve found there were so many things about the disease that I didn’t know. I suggest taking this anonymous quiz to assess your knowledge and your risk level. Next year, I have plans of joining a nonprofit board and I’m think the population I want to serve are people of color living with HIV and AIDS. I need to get involved. I know my family members looking down on me would be proud.
Here are some HIV and AIDS resources of interest because I just know after reading those statistics that you want to be as informed as possible.
Watch an encore presentation of the HIV/AIDS special “What U Know Bout That? Rap-It-Up Sex Quiz” on BET. It will air on Saturday, Dec. 1 at 7:30 p.m. ET/PT.
As I mentioned, I’ll be “black blogging to end AIDS” everyday until Friday, in addition to my regular posts. So please keep reading and commenting. Let me know how AIDS epidemic has affected you. Don’t say it hasn’t. With these kind of statistics, it’s affecting everybody.
I’m signing out with “Visions” by Stevie. It makes me feel good. Hope it does the same for you.
But what I’d like to know
Is could a place like this exist so beautiful
Or do we have to find our wings and fly away
To the vision in our mind?
I’m not one who make believes
I know that leaves are green
They only change to brown when autumn comes around
I know just what I say
Today’s not yesterday
And all things have an ending
* One of the above-mentioned friends informed me that she finally got tested the day before World AIDS day. Have you?
SONGS IN THE KEY OF LIFE 